What Have I Learnt Throughout My Teenage Years?

With my birthday just around the corner and my teenage years coming to an end, I thought I’d share thoughts about my teenage years and what I have learned from over the years.

Between the ages of 13 to 19 years old, I realised that life and time should never be taken for granted.. ever; time is very limited and nothing lasts forever. We go on like our friends and family will always be there, or that we will always get to see tomorrow when anyone can go just like that.

• Being yourself:
I’m not a carbon copy of anyone; I am not like anyone else. I am unique, myself, an individual. We all seem to follow and do things just because other people do it. If there’s no heart or passion in it, there’s no point of doing or being it.

• Friends:
I’ve learned that you have to be careful with who you can call ‘a friend’ as some have dark hearts and minds. A friend should always be there for you and have your back at all times, not leaving you for anything or snaking them. And you as a friend should do the same. Friends are loyal. Having that loyalty is so important and a vital key for trust. Without trust, how can any form of good relationship with anyone exist? I have a thing about trust and I have stupidly trusted people again after they did me wrong, but I’ve learnt not to trust people too quick.

• Sex:
Sex nowadays can mean anything to anyone but not always the same thing to two people involved. Sex can be meaningful but it can also be meaningless. I don’t like having sex with anyone; for me to do a thing with someone, they must be close, open, someone who I can talk to about anything (and vice versa), have an ambition and most of all trustworthy. Its not just down to looks. I couldn’t do it with anyone that isn’t what I’ve mentioned above, that will just be pointless sex to me. I’ve also learnt that sex can be a great thing but may also be a life-changing thing if not protected; people are having kids and are not even prepared to be parents but have no choice but to be one because they didn’t use protection.

• Relationships:
I learnt a lot from relationships with the girls/women that I’ve been with, I’ve learnt a lot how to treat a woman right to what mistakes I wish I never done. I’ve learnt that relationships should NEVER be rushed. Rushing into it can create problems and can also mess things so much that it doesn’t work. A relationship based purely on sex is dead and pointless to me. I don’t see it as a relationship if its just about that one activity, that deep connection needs to be there and if that ain’t there, there is no relationship.

• Love (for people):
I’ve learnt that there is one and only one type of love that exists, and that is called unconditional love. If you show people love, they will show you love. All the things I’ve been through with my friends and family, like all the bad stuff, I wish we never went through that, but its life experience and deep down in my heart, I love all my friends and family, no matter what.. Even though I may not show it.

• Love (Relationships):
Love in terms of relationships, I feel that I can’t truly fall into that again, I honestly do. People would say the three words loosely in a relationships but it don’t mean nothing if you don’t feel it. Even if my partner was to tell me that she loves me, I would never say it until I genuinely feel it.. And to perfectly real, I’ve only been in love once and I don’t plan on doing that again for probably a good while.

• Pathways:
Where you go and what you do in life affects the future. You may want to get into some sort of professional career but what you do and how you do it can affect whether you get there or not. Getting arrested for a crime can affect your jobs and plans a lot.
We know what we would like to be in the future, and if we act on our future asap we can get close to it sooner.

• Maturing:
As a young black male and the first child of the family, I had to grow up quick. I have times where I just want to be 16 and a childish again without a care in the world but as a male that’s been known to inspire a lot of young people, I have to show professionalism an grow up fast. Life is short and every day I learn a lot which helps me understand, develop and mature quickly.

They’re some of the things I’ve learnt. Feel free to ask me anything about thoughts on whatever and I’ll explain.